RABO Networks kann mich mal am Arsch lecken.

 Liebe Freunde, wenn ihr PC Teile braucht, macht einen WEITEN Bogen um den Online-Shop "RABO Networks". Einen inkompetenteren Saftladen habe ich im Leben noch nicht erlebt.[...](show me)(don't show me)

Ich kaufte Anfang Februar dort eine Grafikkarte, die "GeForce 8500GT". Das ist eine etwas aeltere Graka, aber zusammen mit dem ganzen anderen Kram, den ich woanders gekauft habe, passt diese Graka genau in das Watt-Budget meines jetzigen Netzteils. Geld gespart. Dieser Shop war der einzige Ort, wo es diese Karte noch gab (ein Gluecksfall!, so dachte ich).

Bis ich meine Bestell-Bestaetigungs-eMail erhalten habe, ging alles noch gut. Allerdings bekam ich keine Gelderhalt-Bestaetigungs-eMail (noch nicht so wild) und auch keine dem Sachverhalt entsprechende "Lieber Kunde, uns ist leider die Ware ausgegangen; wir muessen erstmal nachbestellen."-eMail, die zu diesem Zeitpunkt haette kommen sollen (kaeme die eMail, haette ich es noch verstanden. Aber gewundert habe ich mich schon: beim Kauf haben sie Warenknappheit nicht erwaehnt).

Nach ein paar Wochen, nahm ich eMail-Kontakt auf und fragte nach, was denn schief gegangen sei - die Antwort liess erstmal einige Tage auf sich warten (hat mich schon mal etwas aufgebracht). Aber als sie kam, erklaerte der Herr Geschaeftsfuehrer die Warenknappheit (ach so) und fragte auch gleich nochmal nach: "Es war die 9500GT, richtig?". Ich stutzte. Nein, 9500GT ist nicht richtig. Die richtige Modelnummer stand doch in der eMail, wenn er sich mal zum runterscrollen bemuehte. Ich antwortete mit Verstaendnis gegenueber der Warenknappheit und klaerte ihn ueber das Missverstaendnis auf. Nochmal eine Woche keine Antwort.

Naechsten Montag rief ich an; das Telefonat ging recht flott, da mir vorgegaukelt wurde, dass im Computer nach meinem Namen und im Lager nach der Ware nachgeguckt wurde. "Die 8500GT. Ja, die haben wir da." ("wir" vor allem). Anschliessend versprach der Mitarbeiter mir, dass sie naechsten Mittwoch da sein wuerde. Ich freute mich und legte auf. Und wartete. Und wartete. Er musste gegaukelt haben, denn ich wartete vergebens.

Meine naechste eMail war weniger freundlich. Der am naechsten Tag antwortende Geschaeftsfuehrer sah darueber hinweg und versprach, sich der Sache hoechstpersoenlich zu widmen. Gleichzeitig bat er um Verstaendnis: es sei doch Karneval. Wie bitte? Du sollst mir die scheiss Karte schicken und nicht feiern! Und ueberhaupt - Februar war noch kein Karneval.

Ich antwortete immer unfreundlicher, sein "Bemuehen" wurde scheinbar immer "ernster" (ui, jetzt schickt er schon eMails mit Top-Prioritaets-Ausrufezeichen). "Am Samstag.", versprach er mir. Ich glaubte schon nicht mehr dran. Aber (und lassen wir mal den unfaehigen Postboten und den ebenso unfaehigen Nachbarn weg) die Grafikkarte kam an. Endlich!, so freute ich mich.

Aber jetzt kam erst der Ober-Hammer: ich machte den Karton auf und mich begruesste eine nigelnagelneue "GeForce EN210". What.The.Fuck!? Schon wieder die Falsche? Nichtmal eine Rechnung wurde beigepackt. Das muss wohl ein Ein-Mann-Betrieb sein!

Das war mir jetzt aber auch egal. Sie uebersteigt nicht mein Watt-Limit, also habe ich sie jetzt eingebaut. Mal sehen, ob sie mir jetzt die Bude abfackelt.

(´_` )

Retail Game refuses to play

 I pre-ordered "Metroid: Other M" and was astonished to find out it wouldn't work on my console. A same-region retail disc, an "original" as you might want to call it, and it wouldn't start properly (black screen after the selecting the disc in the Wii Main Menu) without the correct update files. I mean, I get it, it makes total sense, but ... it's still a harsh situation, I think. [...](show me)(don't show me)

So, I wandered into the ether of the internet in an attempt to find out which particular IOS files I would need. Here, for instance, among many other places. Well, good luck with that. Nobody really knows anything for sure. Which is why I downloaded this IOS and tested whether or not the game now works, then I installed that IOS after which I tested again with the same miserable results ...

So, at the end of the day, not knowing what I was - in a way - asked to do, I ended up installing and updating many IOS files via DOP-Mii (got I love that app). These in particular:

ios58-64-v5918
ios52-64-v5661
ios70-64-v6687
ios57-64-v5661
ios56-64-v5405
ios51-64-v4633
ios50-64-v4889
ios46-64-v3350
ios45-64-v3348
ios43-64-v3348
ios41-64-v3348
ios35-64-v3349
ios34-64-v3348
ios33-64-v3091
ios31-64-v3349
ios28-64-v1550
ios22-64-v1037
ios21-64-v782
ios17-64-v775
ios14-64-v520
ios13-64-v273
ios12-64-v269

I don't really know why I needed what I needed because the descriptions of the IOSs didn't mention anything that could have helped me with my problem (like "This one enables support for dual layers.") and most certainly I installed a lot of crap along with it but ... hey, it seems that what I've done has worked since I can play that game now. And it already passed that critical moment at the beginning where so many other people have had trouble with.

I haven't tested yet though, now, at this moment, in this altered situation, which game that worked before doesn't work anymore. But wayne. The Homebrew Channel is now upside-down, so I definitely made some mistake, but I know that that's not such big a deal. It's an old and harmless bug, really.
# top #

Finding a DVD on eBay

 I very recently bought two Jackie Chan DVDs that can be found in the so called "Armour Of God Pack" and, again, I did those nasty mistakes that I tend to do when I buy a DVD via eBay. I hope, in the future I can avoid these mistakes if I sit down for once and write them down. [...]
(show me)(don't show me)

Always check the description of the DVDs and check them twice. Search for Language information, Region Code information and whether or not Extras like a Making Of are contained.

Regarding the language, with Jackie Chan I was lucky because I really don't want much more languages than the german version - it's good to have cantonese but I probably will never look that, not in a Jackie Chan movie - but still, watch out for these traps. Besides, despite the fact that a "Digitally Remastered" tag might look and/or sound good, as I've seen now it actually can turn out quite bad. The "Digitally Remastered" version of "Armour Of God I" for instance was annoyingly enhanced by comical goof sound bits during almost every hit, kick and jump. I absolutely don't think that was appropriate. I'm glad you can switch from the embarassing "Deutsch DD 5.1" to the unharmed "Deutsch DD 1.0". Maybe I should have read and searched about this version in forums before I decided to pay money for it.

Another thing to look out for is the tag "Uncut". With a movie that old this doesn't necessarily mean that scenes of gore or nudity were cut out but instead it might mean that there are scenes included now which don't have a voice over at all but subtitles instead - right in the middle of the otherwise dubbed movie. Yeesh.
# top #

Awgust oh nein

 I went to the GamesCom this year (which is 2oo9, which makes it GamesCom 2oo9 - yay, now I can find this article by searching for "GamesCom 2oo9" ...) and I took .. some photos. Initially I thought and I hoped I'd do more but there really wasn't that much that appealed to me, visually. Except for the booth babes who sometimes surprised me by turning away whenever I produced my camera. I thought it was their job to let the conventioneers take pictures of them - among other things. Whatever. Maybe they didn't want ME to have a photo of them in scantily clothed fashion. Again, whatever. Maybe I lost it, "that certain sight" that helped me see things, special things, and take photos that I like, photos that I once in a while courageously tag as "cool". Or maybe I never had it ... [...]
(show me)(don't show me)

On top of that I'd like to add a quick memo to myself: gaming conventions only look cool when read about in an article. Or the "internets". IMHO. Actually being there can turn out to be very boring quite fast - especially if you have to wait in line all the time. And by "all the time" I mean several hours for a single line and several times for the really interesting venues - like the booths that displayed God Of War 3 or Modern Warfare 2. And then it's not even new stuff, levels you already know from the past E3. Or just a video trailer. You don't really get that when you read the articles or see videos about the games that were shown there. You don't actually find a video in the iNet that shows how long you wait in line to see such a game. Well, this is certainly true for most conventions. So, whenever I might find a portal again that is capable of throwing me into this strange and fascinating dimension of odd time progression I might re-read these lines and reconsider my chances of actually having fun ...

Well, to return to the major point of this psoting, I would upload said sparse photos if I hadn't found out recently that my new PC monitor (which is now my primary monitor out of two monitors in a dual monitor setup), you know, the monitor I used to edit images in photoshop for the last few weeks, has a major green tint. Major! Yes, in retrospect I screwed up so many images in that time that I don't even want to open photoshop anymore. I don't even know if it's the monitor, the DVI cable or the graphics card that is the source of the problem. I feel like I'm in school again where this constantly happened to me. I'm so fucking tired.

Anyway, to round shit up let me tell you what to do if you have a Wii™ game (most assumably a WiiWare or Virtual Console title) that loads up the preview image / animation for its channel in the Wii™ Main Menu but reboots the console when you click on start. Tales Of Monkey Island: Chapter 1: Launch Of The Narwhal (or TOMI 1 for short) has been one of these games for me. Technically you could say, the console needs to be updated, but don't be afraid of bricking because properly updating is far from difficult. Just never use out-of-region updates for your specific region, you know, the ultimate ever-true rule of Wii™ homebrewing. In fact, there are a ton of links and forum threads out there that relate to this topic. But anyway I went off-topic.

I found this very interesting site that explains the "mechanism" behind the different IOSes a bit which is what made me realize that I need certain IOSes for that game to run on my console. After I googled around to find out which ones I needed, I got them and installed them via the WAD Manager and now the game runs smoothly. Well, as smoothly as it can run. The Wii™ obviously doesn't seem to be the primary platform this game was created for (don't enter the Pause Menu at the docks after the green cloud appeared) ... hm, maybe I'll do a review for that game. Just maybe.
# top #

Problem Solver

 Many problems have accumulated over the past weeks and now I solved them all in almost one single day. Also there was some need for a memo or two to myself. Most of it was PC related though so ... meh! [...]
(show me)(don't show me)

[···] Problem: the printer idled although there were jobs in the queue. And cancelling (= deleting) them actually worked, that's not an expected reaction to my orders so I list it as a symptom ;^p

My solution: in my particular case the printer was just paused. I don't know what caused it - I definitely didn't do it, neither manually nor intentionally. But entering the printer folder with the Windows Explorer and resuming it via right-click did the trick.

If you came here by Google or so and exptected or need a more sophisticated solution try one of those that I found during my research:
- You could re-install the drivers of the printer or re-install the printer software.
- You could shutdown the PC, reconnect all cables and reboot. For this guy this seemed to work:

<<
Ich hab in den Gerätemanager reingeguckt. Es lief alles okay. Dann hab ich den Drucker einmal den Strom genommen und den PC heruntergefahren. Dann hat er wieder funktioniert. Ich habe allerdings vorher auch schon den PC neu gestartet. Na ja, hauptsache es funktioniert wieder alles :cool: !
>> Source: Computer Hilfen.de

[··.] Problem: the Nintendo Wii can connect to my router but the Nintendo DS can't (Error #51099).

My solution: none.

It never will be able to because my router features 8o2.11g and 8o2.11g only - I just keep forgetting that and repeat looking it up in a two-year-interval:

<<
The Wii can connect to any router supporting 802.11b/g but the DS only supports 802.11b, if the router is set to only 802.11g mode the DS will not even see it. The Wii also supports more secure encryption like WPA - PSK (TKIP), WPA - PSK (AES), WPA2 - PSK (AES), and the not so secure WEP. The DS only supports WEP however, the router would have to be set to use 802.11b/g mixed or just 802.11b and only WEP to allow both to connect. [...]
>> Source: Tech Forums of Nintendo.com

It's because the NDS is so much older and the guys at Nintendo developed the Nintendo Wi-Fi service. The real solution stays the same: if I really want to make it work I have to buy the USB Nintendo Wi-Fi Dongle and convert my PC into an access point. And 3o bucks are too expensive for that, IMHO.

[·.·] Problem: I tried to play the PAL version of Klonoa on my Wii which should work but I was encountered with a black screen - no error at all (which is a well known error, well known to the homebrew scene and to me as well - I'm just describing it).

My solution: I will just say, the "Error #002 fix" solved this problem for me. Which is odd because as I said I got no error code at all. You may find out yourself how to do that fix.

[ Woody's Checkpoint: # top # ]

[·..] Problem: Two or three days earlier my Wii didn't start Boom Blox which I already had played months ago at that point.
My solution: so it seems I keep forgetting how to start my games. Which is why I want to write down a memo to myself: start NTSC games with an english system language. No need to change the TV Hz settings.

[.··] Problem: Wad-titles for the Virtual Console can be installed on the Wii and are displayed properly but they print this error to screen: "This channel can't be used.".

My solution: you might convert them to the proper region (either that or directly no region at all) and if that doesn't work (black screen after hitting "Start") then it can't be helped. Get the proper region right from the start the next time.

And if you can't even install them with the WAD Manager due to "-1020" errors then I fear you have to downgrade the console to 3.2 - personally I think that's not worth the effort.

[.·.] Problem: I wanted to watch a certain video file on the big TV screen, for once because it's a (hopefully) cool movie but also because my PC is too weak - it's an HD video. The size of the file is 4,3 GB but I can't copy it to my external hard drive to watch the video on my PS3 because the HDD is formatted in FAT32. FAT32 doesn't support files bigger than 4 GB. NTFS does so but the PS3 doesn't support NTFS.

My solution: use your PC as a media server. I utilized this PS3 Media Server application. Normally I would defend the elegance of the external HDD approach but for one video this nasty I chose to make an exception.

You could also use the Windows Media Player 11 - I know it works, I used it myself on my old Windows setup. But it's hard to install, IMHO.

Strangely enough the first time I tried to play the video file my PS3 said it was corrupted. But my stubbornness proved useful as the file could be played on the second attempt - although not fluently yet, not at all ... maybe something for the next weeks. I guess if the video is too hi-res to just play it on the PC itself, the CPU might be overwhelmed by the additional task of streaming it. So, no solution possible for this video file :^(
# top #

my Ubuntu / WinXP Dual Boot Installation experience

 Well, after several months of frustrating battles with the funny world of Linux configuration wonders I was too afraid to install Windows XP on my Linux machine as a second OS without a professional by my side. All the more as it is more common to first install Windows and then Linux on a machine to make it "Dual Boot", as they call it. That's why I consulted the allmighty, all knowing naagenizer to help me with this challenge which he eagerly did. In fact, he did all the magic while I was sitting at the only seat proper for this kind of situation: not between keyboard and chair ;^p [...]
(show me)(don't show me)

Well, the first thing to mention is that it came in *pretty* handy that I already pre-formatted a partition for Windows on my secondary slave hard disk drive via Ubuntu's GParted. Yes, secondary slave. I feared this could be unhealthy for the Windows setup, making my PC explode during the process or something of the like, but fortunately I was terribly wrong. The solution was awefully easy: just shutdown the workstation and disengage the current entry from all the HDDs that are not involved in the upcoming installation process so that they won't be seen by your PC. What's not visible can't be damaged accidently, right? Cool. Well, actually I already knew that much, but what I didn't know was that without an altered jumper setting and without the primary HDD to refer to, a secondary slave HDD still is a secondary slave HDD. Great, so there won't be any messing up when I reconnect the other drives.

Anyway, that HDD in question is very big (25o GB) and there still was (and still is) very much free space to use. The only slightly disturbing problem was that this to-become-Windows-partition was not the disk's primary partiton; it was (and still is) embedded in the extended partition of the HDD. Take a look at the screenshot to see what I mean. Well, that screenshot shows how it is *now*, not how it was before the installation but let me tell you that only little has changed. So, what we can see is a 2oo MB small primary partition formatted in NTFS (that was unformatted before this "challenge") and an extended one containing two more partitions: an almost 2oo GB big EXT3 linux partition with lots of data *not* to be deleted and a smaller 45 GB partition for Windows, already formatted in FAT32. Because of (or <probably because of>) the embeddedness of that partition it was impossible to simply move it to the primary position so we - okay, okay, it was naagenizer's idea ;^p - had to think of a way to make it work nevertheless. Much googling was involved in this planning phase.

Well, the plan was to install Windows on that partition, then edit the Grub configuration later on. For people not knowing what Grub is (like me just until recently): it is the name of the boot loader in Linux language. Or maybe only Ubuntu language, I'm not that sure. So, in order to install Windows XP from the CD we had to change the boot order to first boot from the CD-ROM drive. Sounds easy, right? Well ... it wasn't. At least at first it wasn't. We found ourselves very, very confused to the unexplainable handicap of not being able to press any keyboard key until the DOS mode has been passed and Ubuntu started loading. Well, to make this strange story short: the non-USB keyboard was attached to the wrong PS/2-slot, namely the one for the mouse. You know, it's pretty dark under this desk of mine where the backside of the PC is located and late at night I can hear the wolves howl down there so I always act quick to get the hell outta there ... (¬__¬; ) *rolleyes* *blush* *sweat* But why is Ubuntu smart enough to detect this user's malheur and correct it while ignoring the possibility to make the user know that he did something wrong? An outrage.

Anyway, after solving this funky keyboard behaviour by plugging the keyboard in the right slot we entered the "blue DOS screen of Windows installation". And there we found it: the partition screen showed three still connected HDDs and they were all named "Disk 0", every single one of them. So that's the final proof to me to *always*, without exception, remove all disk drives before installing Windows to a PC machine with important data still existing on it. So, we already know that removing the other disk drives solves the problem. Now, we've had three partitions on our screen: the unformatted small primary one, the Linux one and the empty fat32 one. Gladly the Windows installer autonomously noted that the first partition needed formatting so we did - while holding our breaths - and the installer changed it to a boot partition or boot loader partition or something like that. Now, finally, we simply could install Windows on the partition prepared for this occasion - without re-formatting it!

[ Woody's Checkpoint: # top # ]

So there actually never was any dangerous chance of accidentally formatting something not to be formatted. At least in my special case of WinXP Dual Boot installation. Come to think of it: isn't this method more attractive than the common one where you have to install Windows first, then Linux, and also definitely more attractive than the version "Ooh, I spontaneously want to add Windows to my Linux PC. Now what, backup all Linux data? All 3oo+ GBs?!"? If you ask me: hell, yes it is! So, back to the subject, the Grub configuration didn't work at first go but after a little bit of trial and error the right code was found. With   cat /boot/grub/device.map   you first look at your HDDs because you need this different names and in   /boot/grub/menu.lst   you write:

title           Windows XP
rootnoverify    (hd2,0)
chainloader     +1
map             (hd2) (hd0)
makeactive
boot

The map line tells the Grub loader that it has to follow the link over the first partition to get to the Windows partition. This way Windows thinks it's a primary partition. This whole map/Grub-part could be of interest again when I will consider upgrading my distribution - if I'm about to do that. Here are some screenshots.

And now - what a fucking surprise - we were done! This was certainly easier than I would have thought it to be. But still I'm glad to have had the help of naag. He just has this certain flair of trouble-counterprotection around him ... always a solution in his mind. Anyway after that was done - or was it along the way - he took care of my iNet settings and other stuff I've had trouble with for weeks, if not months. But not very much later he left me alone to start the furious "Windows apps install"-session. Why the hell can't installing stuff on Ubuntu be THAT easy?! I nearly cried for joy.

But nevertheless, as easy as installing programs was, as irritating and unreasonable were certain other things like why I didn't have any sound support. The sound settings and all volume bars were disabled because the audio component on my machine had no proper driver to be guided by. Okay, I had not thought of installing the mainboard sound drivers for the onboard audio up to that point but when I did, strangely, the drivers on that mainboard CD weren't recognized as the proper ones although all my indicators of reason disagreed with that opinion. After several hours of googling and searching the web, downloading & installing different drivers, rebooting, testing, (screaming), I managed to install the exact right driver, not too old and not too new, one that I've found here.

After this exciting task was taken care of (at least at first as I was about to experience) I've met two new friends who I'd like to introduce to you: Explore2fs & Ext2 Installabe File System or Ext2 IFS, both Windows applications that let you as a Windows user access Linux partitions on your working machine. The first one is more of an active, a "ROM"-approach, letting you read and execute data but not write, with the "read"-function called "export", while the second application, Ext2 IFS, rather is a passive solution. Its setup comes up only once and after that you always have access to your paritions that are located "on the other side of the planet". Really a good thing. There exists a vice-versa-application (or configuration) for Ubuntu, too, but I don't have time for that now.

[ Woody's Checkpoint: # top # ]

Now, similarly to the irritating audio inaccessibility, two other components didn't seem to work right: the graphics card and the ethernet controller, although in a slightly distinguished way. While I had no problems at all to browse and do settings in Windows concerning the video output, the games had quite some trouble running smoothly. So, there we went again, searching the web for the right driver as the first and most intuitive one didn't seem to make my Windows happy. But a few hrs. - and therapy hrs. - later I managed to find one that fitted via the advanced search of the nVidia website.

Similarly confusing is this display at my System Properties: it says something about a 64-something processor - but I don't have a 64bit-processor. I know my mainboard is new, but it doesn't have a 64bit-processor. The nVidia-driver for 64bit-Windows I tried to install out of slight desperation confirmed that fact. Why the hell do I have to know this kind of stuff as a user anyway?! I don't care what my mainboard is called or what type it is. Shouldn't the PCs nowadays be capable enough of coping with that kind of information? I demand more automatization! System information automatization = more user comfort. Dear developers of Windows and the like: just let my Windows create a file with all the information my system has to offer, so I can send it to a tech support where the tech guy (or gal) can pick the information he (or she) needs. Or I can show this file to a friend who is a computer professional. I mean I know some stuff about computers but there's still a wide world to explore for me. But no, don't listen to that bumhead Woody; put all those informations here and there, hack them into little pieces of information and distribute 'em all over the entire software where it can play hide and seek with ya ... UNGH! (>< )

Anyways, so much for that. That is about the status quo. The ethernet controller still demands some attention but I should be able to fix that this afternoon. I haven't needed it yet so it happens to come in last although it's kind of the most important unit for what I'm planning this weekend but .. things like that happen. Unimportant. Now I have two operating systems, two halves that is, as I'm unsatisfied with each of them as a whole. But irrelevant. No isolation any more from the world of photoshop artists, PC gamers and delphi programmers. I feel much more .. complete again ... ;^)

Okay, okay, okay, I have one final matter on my mind and with that a note to myself: sort your motherboard-packages out! No wonder the motherboard CD didn't work as it was the CD of another board! Why do I have to keep boards, manuals, CDs, IDE cables and stuff like that unsorted in a messy mixed-up chaotic pile of "I don't care"- / "away with that"-junk? The proper CD was in my "Administrator"-CD-case or what way to call it. Once popped in everything ran as smooth as a butter smeared butt on a jolly joy slide. Gnaah!
# top #

pubococcygeus ... or so

Mann, ist das schwer, seinen PC-Muskel zu trainieren. Ich krieg ihn ja noch nicht mal vernuenftig isoliert. Und der Muskelkater, der nur dann auftritt, wenn ich den Muskel anspanne, will auch schon seit Tagen nicht gehen. Wie spanne ich denn bitte gezielt den Bauch an? Bloeder Muskelklumpen.
Wofuer mache ich das eigentlich? Ich bin so muede ...
(note to myself: PC-Muskeltraining scheiterte an der Isolation)

Current Catchy Tune: Dieses eine Lied aus den 9o-ern, wo eine Stimme wie die von Seal singt. Der Refrain geht irgendwie so:
[Bridge]
"Love. You.
Love. You.
Love. You.
Love ..."
"Micheeeeeeeeeeeelle" na na na na na naaa na naa,
"Micheeeeeeeeeeeelle" na na na na na naaa na naa [usw.]

wie frustrierend, dass ich dazu nix finde. selbst mit SongTapper.com nicht, was ich heute zufaellig gefunden habe und sehr nuetzlich finde.

Voll und rund

Kuchen, Kaese-/Schinken-Platten, Broetchen, Croissants, Kuchen, Kuchen, Plaetzchen, Schoko-Nikolaus, Hefezopfmaennchen mit Pfeife (oder wie der heisst), Croissants, Kaese-/Schinken-Platten, Kuchen, Lasagne ...

es wird wieder Zeit fuer eine kleine Notiz an mich selbst: ich sollte im Monat Dezember in Zukunft gaenzlich darauf verzichten, dem normalen Wochenablauf entsprechend zusaetzlich noch den Kuehlschrank mit Essen zu fuellen.

日本語能力試験３級 ・体験

Düsseldorf. Sonntag, o4.12.2oo5. o9:33.
Ein leicht regnerischer Morgen klopft an mein Fenster. Ich hasse es, vor meinem Wecker aufzustehen. Ich drehe mich auf die Seite. [...]
(Read Full Text)

1o:16.
Hm, wenn ich genauer drueber nachdenke, kann ich eigentlich auch jetzt schon aufstehen. Beim Hochziehen des Rollos stelle ich fest, dass der Himmel grau und die Strasse vom vorueber gegangenen Regen nass ist - hm, must be Sunday. Ich blicke auf meinen Schreibtisch. Dort liegt bereits alles aufgebahrt, was ich fuer den heutigen Tag brauche, damit ich es nicht vergesse: ein Radiergummi, ein Anspitzer, ein nach allen Regeln der Aesthetik praezise angespitzter Bleistift und mein so genannter "Test Voucher", welcher nach einigen den Postdienst beanspruchenden Versendungen und (maschinell getaetigten?) Ueberpruefungen beweist, dass ich mich vor ueber 2 Monaten schon fuer den "Japanese Language Proficiency Test (Level 3)" (Japanisch-Leistungs-Test) angemeldet habe, und welchen ich vorsorglich in den gefalteten Willkommens- und Informationsbrief der Volkshochschule Duesseldorf gelegt habe. In letzterem wird ueber den heute stattfindenden Test informiert:
Anwesenheitsueberpruefung der Teilnehmer: 11:45.
Vorbesprechung: 12:45.
Pruefungsbeginn: 13:30.
Ende: ?. Steht hier nicht, aber so ein Test kann doch nicht lange dauern, oder? Wie war denn das nochmal letztes Mal vor zwei, drei Jahren? Ich hab's vergessen. Ich schaetze mal 'ne Stunde, oder zwei. Vllt. geht noch was, heute nachmittag.
Eigentlich haette man drauf kommen koennen, dass es definitiv laenger dauern wuerde, als das, was ich geschaetzt habe, wenn man sich mal die genannten Zeiten genauer anguckt und ein wenig nachdenkt. Naja, ich tat dies nicht ... -.-'

11:o2.
Ich mache mich auf den Weg zum S-Bahnhof. Meine Bahn kommt um 11:15, werde wohl viel zu frueh da sein. Aber besser zu frueh als zu spaet, oder? Gerade bei so einem wichtigen Tag, oder? (verdammter Spiesser). Naja, jedenfalls dachte sich Peter Bernardi wohl so etwas aehnliches, denn er taucht ploetzlich hinter mir auf - natuerlich auch auf dem Weg zum JLPT; natuerlich wieder eine Stufe hoeher als ich, naemlich Stufe 2, die zweit schwerste. Fleissig, wie er ist, zeigt er mir in der Bahn, was er alles fuer den Test koennen muss, in Form eines selbst erstellten Heftes bestehend aus genug DIN A4 Blaettern, um in dieser gehefteten Form und mit etwas Kraft eine gesunde Wuestenspringmaus in ihrer Bluetezeit zu erschlagen. Etwas voreilig schiesst es aus meinem Mund heraus: "Das sind doch nur Vokabeln." Ich hatte noch gar nicht so recht begriffen, was er mir damit sagen will, und wollte es mal genauer untersuchen, da schnappt er es mir auch schon wieder aus der Hand, um daraus zu lernen. Spaeter checkte ich, dass es um die Masse der ca. 6.ooo Vokabeln ging. Hm, Hut ab. Da liegt noch einiges vor mir.

11:3o.
An der Volkshochschule angekommen hatte Peter bereits diverse alte Bekannte getroffen. Ich sah auch ein, zwei bekannte Gesichter aus meinen Sprachkursen an der Uni. Schnell angemeldet, um zu zeigen, dass man auch anwesend ist, standen wir dann ziemlich lange da und warteten. Diese Gehirnakrobaten. Da sassen also vier Helferinnen von der Volkshochschule an zwei langen Tischen und baten die Prueflinge, sich vor ihren Tischen in vier Schlangen aufzustellen. Um das System, das dahinter steckte zu verdeutlichen, hing vor jedem Anwesenheits-Ueberpruefer ein Zettel am Tisch, der die ihr zugeteilte Stufe abdeckte. Leider war dieser Zettel am Tisch angebracht (also nicht auf Augenhoehe) und leider standen alle Prueflinge in dieser Schlange vor dem Tisch, sodass man den Zettel erst dann gesehen hat, wenn man ganz vorne war. Also musste man - sofern man dies nicht wusste - unter Umstaenden erschreckt feststellen, dass man richtig lange in der falschen Schlange stand. Naja ...
Nach und nach stiessen immer mehr Leute und auch ein paar mehr bekannte Gesichter dazu. Sogar Lisa Philip aus den Sprachkursen der Volkshochschulzeit. Sowas. Dieses Jahr haben sich insgesamt 4o6 Leute angemeldet, 335 Deutsche und ca. 13o alleine fuer Stufe 3.

12:45. Die Vorbesprechung.
(note to myself - fuer's naechste Mal:) Da haette man ruhig auch eine Stunde spaeter kommen koennen! Bis gerade eben wurde die Anwesenheit der Leute ueberprueft. Nun stellen sich die Verantwortlichen in Kuerze vor (Herr Stoebke war auch da, mein erster bedeutender Sensei), die Prueflinge werden aufgeteilt und in die Raeume gefuehrt.

13:37. (ich schwoere, das ist kein Witz - ich habe es schon wieder getan ;^)
Der Test ist in drei Teile unterteilt: Kanji & Vokabeln, Hoerverstaendnis und Leseverstaendnis & Grammatik. Zwischen den drei Teilen gibt es jeweils eine laengere Pause, sodass alle gleichzeitig mit einem Teil anfangen und (zumindest offiziell) aufhoeren. Ich habe bereits die erste Haelfte aller Antworten des ersten Teils hinter mir und gerade mal ein Viertel der fuer diesen Teil vorgesehenen Zeit beansprucht. Den Test schaffe ich locker.
Spaeter macht mir der Hoerverstaendnis-Teil einigermassen zu schaffen, aber das hatte ich bereits erwartet. Ausserdem hatte mich Peter daran erinnert, dass dies der Schwachpunkt der meisten Leute ist.

16:3o.
Ich bin fertig. Offiziell ist zwar erst um 17:oo Schluss, aber ich bin jetzt schon fertig. So pingelig wie bisher alles gehandhabt wurde, lassen sie bestimmt niemanden frueher gehen. Hm, irgendwie muss ich also Zeit verbringen, um nicht dem Wahnsinn zm Opfer zu fallen. Die Antwortboegen, die maschinell analysiert werden, sind Abreissboegen - fuer jeden Teil ein Bogen. Zum Schluss, nachdem, alle drei Boegen abgerissen wurden, bleibt von diesen Boegen also ein Schnipsel uebrig, ca. 1 cm breit und 5o cm lang.
Ich habe Bock auf Origami. Die einfachste Figur: der Schwan. Hierfuer benoetigt man als Ausgangsposition ein quadratisches Stueck Papier. Das Endprodukt ist nicht hoeher als 5 mm. Geil. Weil's so schoen war, gleich nochmal. Diesmal dem Schwan etwas mehr Hals geben. Der erste sieht so kurz aus. Die zwei Schwaene brauchen eine Mutter. Ich falte einen Schwan aus der aeusseren Papierverpackung eines Kaugummis. Die Lust vergeht nicht und die Zeit scheint dies auch nicht zu tun. Ein weiterer Schwan muss her, diesmal aus der inneren Kaugummi-Verpackung, diesem einseitig silbernen Papier. Eine Schwanfamilie!



Die Qualitaet der Fotos ist echt beschissen, weil ich nicht daran gedacht habe, die Kameralinse zu reinigen. Egal, vor meinem geistigen Auge werden diese Schwane ewig leben.

Okay, ich gebe zu, ich habe diesen ganzen langen verrueckten Bericht lediglich aus dem Grund geschrieben, damit ich das schlecht geschossene Foto hier posten kann, weil ich ja schon irgendwie einigermassen stolz bin auf diese Exemplare meines Origami-Zaubers - auch wenn die geringe Qualitaet der Fotos nicht im Geringsten mithalten kann mit diesem Akt der komprimierten Perfektion. Ausserdem wollte ich mal wieder einen dieser verrueckten langen Berichte schreiben, um damit diesen HomeBlog etwas belebter werden zu lassen (ich sag nur: 0 Comments, 0 Comments, 0 Comments). Ich meine .. momentan ... wozu mache ich das alles ueberhaupt?! ... ach ja: fuer mich.

Naja, ich geniesse jetzt erst mal meine Pizza (hmmm, Pizza ... -___-)